"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
