i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
