Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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