WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
