I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
