i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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