Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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