ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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