Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
wat bout pragnant strippers??
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
