OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize