he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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