No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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