The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
