Kareoke will never be a sober sport
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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