do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
The Olympian is in my bed
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
