He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
