I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize
