so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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