Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize
