he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I'm at about main and main street
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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