I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
