HIV tests are more positive than that guy
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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