there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
