Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
