she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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