Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Randomize
