u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
