Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
