Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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