Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
