I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
