All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
