You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
