i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize