i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize