evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
