May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We talked him into tasing himself.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
