so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
If I die, sorry about rent.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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