And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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