Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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