dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize