So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
