so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize