what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
