So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
