Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
We smell like vodka and hangover
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
