I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
