Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Is Oprah even human
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
