I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
