I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
